Buried in my heart

It kind of suck when you're in trouble w/ your emotions yourself, and yet you have to put up a brave front and show people that you're not weak and that, you can handle them. People come to me for advices, I just can't reject them cause that would be too mean of me. I listened to them, gave them my opinions and often wonder, why can't I use my own opinions against myself? Guess that's what everybody feels. You can tell people what you feel about certain things, but when it boils down to you, yourself, you can't say the same thing anymore.

I can only let my brave front down in front of three people (one of which is Val cousin, in case you didn't know!) and you know who are the two right! I mean, i can get god-damn irritating once i start on a certain subject that's weighing on my heart. And i was only being irritating to these three people. These three who have been w/ me since forever. I let my guard down in front of them because i know, that they won't judge me even after i say something or annoys them with that certain thing. Sigh, life is quite tough huh! This won't do that won't do. Let your guard down and you'll get hurt instantly. Sorry i just wanted to spill the words that have been buried in my heart for quite some time but i don't know who and how to tell them, so here i am blogging it down.